Manifesto

Okay so- it's nearly election time. Shouldn't be too hard to do better than the existing lot. So here goes:

Foreign Affairs:

We will definitely not be drawn into conflicts in other countries- or sponsor, fund, arm or logistically support any sides in any conflicts around the world. We will not be pushing for "regime change". If other nations wish to change their leaders- good luck to them- don't rely on us. That is after-all what the United Nations is for.

We will insist on the United Nations being the forum for dealing with any international matters, conflicts or issues- just like it used to be. Of course, we will (in Tony Blair style) ask for reform of the United Nations along the following lines-

All new UN resolutions will be binding on all affected countries and parties.

All old UN resolutions will be tabled again & if adopted will be binding

The UN Security Council which is partisan & ineffective will be dissolved - to be replaced by the UN General Assembly as the world's decision making forum. The idea of some countries having more "weight" than others or having vetoes is not acceptable.

We will pull all troops out of everywhere. There's no need for unnecessary wars.

We believe the Israeli-Palestinian conflict is a key priority and needs to be engaged with. To this end we will intensify current diplomatic efforts based on a 2- state solution. This would mean, and we would seek international support for an immediate stop to the building of additional settlements on disputed land. There would be a "committee" of international stakeholders to engage both sides in negotiations.

In the interim- and for the first time- we would advocate that Palestine is made a "Protectorate" of the UN. It then becomes the world's business- and this approach would guarantee a Palestinian State-once negotiations are complete. There would be no need for Palestinians to feel the need to resort to desperate tactics to achieve their aim of a separate viable state. There will immediately be a Palestinian State- under the auspices of the new reformed UN. The exact boundaries of any such state however will be subject to negotiation- between Israel and the UN. This will now be everybody's business.

We will support enhanced roles for the various organs of the UN- UNESCO, UNICEF & so on.

In summary- our policy will be one of peace, mutual cooperation, tackling poverty worldwide, improving trade links and communication links globally.

But what about terrorism, militant groups and such like. Well, these will be engaged head -on by a multinational UN anti-terrorist collaborative force. This will not be a peacekeeping force. We will do what it takes.

There you have it.


Culture Media & Sport:

We will maintain current levels of support and funding streams for sport- at all levels from grassroot to Olympic level. We will not however allow participation in any international event organised by countries in which human rights and/or the rule of law are seriously compromised. We will work to attract top level international competition to the UK- such as World & European Championships in various sports.

We will similarly maintain current support and funding streams for the arts. We will initiate the creation of a national venue for top-level United Kingdom & International art & cultural events- having the same status as the Tate Gallery for example. This will be a designated National Theatre. We will similarly seek to identify regional and county venues which are able to serve as arenas for government supported cultural and theatrical events which people can access at very low rates.

We will immediately seek through parliament- a major review of the BBC licence fee. Our aim will be for a trimmed-down settlement which allows the broadcast of public service programmes, but doesn't support big-budget entertainment programmes for export (such as "The Voice", "The Musketeers" and similar programmes which would be expected to generate sufficient funds to support the other aspects of the BBC's work. Our projected  figure for a potential licence fee is £49.99.

There you have it.

Rebecca's song

So heard Rebecca got conned out of 100k by people she held dear. No doubt she'll put the whole experience to song as a way of dealing with it.

Suppose the song may go like this-

Take my money if you must- but you know then you've taken all my trust
Take my money if you must- but I hope with it you rot and rust
I was conned by your guile
You know your tactics were vile
Now my dreams lay buried in the dust

Take my money if you wish- that never really meant that much
Take my money if you want- as far as that's concerned- you've got the Midas touch
You stood by- watched my poor heart break
Watched my tears become a private lake
And left me with my dreams- lying in the lurch

You take my money- and you're gone. I should be on a massive high
Take my money- now you're gone. Should be easy t'say goodbye
You were the one who betrayed
All my plans so gently laid
One day I know I'll move on- just not today.

Chorus-

Please, please, please won't you stay away
Let me handle this my own special way
One day I'll move on - but not today-

One day I'll move on -just not today.

(End)

Nearly lost it

Untold anguish as I'd thought I'd nearly lost my blog.
Couldn't find it via Google- after frenzied repeated searching.
Felt a sense of anguish and despair.
All my personal little tit-bits gone for good?
Lots of things I know I'd wish to reference in the future
Heck- I'd even got new stuff ready to add.
This is kind of like my own personal Wikipedia- it can't just vanish
Into cyberspace?
Can it?
Seems so.
Definitely wasn't there for a while.
But then that old dee-o-dee bulldog spirit.
Never give up.
"Strong hearts keep going"- and all that.
And hey whadd'ya know.
It's back.
It's here. I'm here.
How lucky can you get.
Ba-oh-di-oh-di-oh-di-oh-di-oh-doe.

Chancellor George Osborne

Chancellor Osborne- George
Kept to the course that he forged
He ignored all advice
And stuck to his vice
Now we're on the edge of a gorge

George Osborne -what can we say?
History's been made today
With all said & done
You turn out the one-
Who's lost us our "Triple A"

Chancellor George Osborne
Deprived us of all our fun
He caused us real pain
With none of the gain-
And now there is nowhere to run


Chancellor George Osborne
No wonder he is looking forlorn
With such heavy loss
Perhaps now will his boss
Give somebody different a turn


Comes across arrogant as a sod
He made our economy plod-
Now he's lost our trust
And it's all "doom & bust"
No wonder they call for his blood


As far as Chancellors go-
This one's at an all time low
For years he's been smug
Now they've pulled out the plug
Daresay- we told you so!

Festivals

We urgently need a directory of festivals. And I don't mean music festivals like "Glasto" (June 26) or the family friendly "Latitude" in Southwold in Suffolk (July 18). Okay- I guess if you like that sort of thing. And I suppose there are more mature music festivals like "The Big Chill", or the "Larmer Tree", or the one in Portmeirion in Wales. But I was thinking more of the exotic, unusual, characterful, nonsense-fun kind of festival.

Over the years, I've been discouraged gently from running-with-the-bulls in Pamplona in June. (Had hotels booked and all). So my new "bezzie" is "La Tomatina" in Bunol near Valencia- last wednesday in August. (Bunol is famed for it's Paella-yum-yum!).

The big one of course- (dr-e-eee-aaa-mmms) will be the New Orleans Jazz Festival (nojazzfest.com April 26) or the Rio Carnival. For Jazz buffs, Nice puts on a good Jazz Festival in June.

In the meantime- locally- across the water in Ireland- in August is the Galway Oyster Festival.  (Be sure also to venture to Moran's Oyster Cottage in nearby Kilcolgan. In Alba (close to Genoa) in Italy, there's the "White Truffle Festival" (October 1). Imagine Truffles over pasta in the town square! Also in Italy is the interesting "Il Palio" horse-riding race event in Siena (16th July and 16th August). And if you happen to be close by Malmo in Sweden- then savour the Malmo Crayfish festival (August 15-22, www.malmofestivalen.se)

Other local favourites are the Town Crier's festival (there's one close to Liverpool I think). and a few festivals where you roll a big round cheese down a small hill (there's bound to be one near you- otherwise head for Cooper's Hill near Gloucester. www.cheese-rolling.co.uk  (May 27). There's also the "Dieppe Kite Flying Festival"- the world's largest -alternate Septembers- if you are so prone. "Oktoberfest" for beer drinkers in Munich- don't ask when. And of course not forgetting the "International Balloon Festival" in new fave city- Bristol.

Fantastic recently also to read about the Calcot (a kind of Asparagus-shaped onion) festival in Valls (last sunday in January), near Reus -not far from Barcelona in Spain. You learn to peel and eat the roasted Calcots- and wash them down with local red wine from a "purro". Or otherwise eat your Calcots in a "masia"- a traditional farmhouse-style restaurant. Yes please!

Of course, if all else fails- there's always the Chelsea Flower Show (rhs.org.uk, May 21st).

Bye.

Non, Rien de rien by Edith Pilaf

Tracked down the words to this lovely song. Love it so much. Generally love french- and this song is good old fashioned traditional french. Quite simple but cohesive- it holds together well (apart from the chorus). But mostly, like most folk I love the way they r-r-r-r-r- oll thei-r-r-r-r   "R"-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-s.




Non, rien de rien
Non, Je ne regrette rien
Ni le bien qu'on m'a fait
Ni le mal, tout ca me bien egal

Non, rien de rien
Non Je ne regrette rien
C'est paye, balaye, oublie-
Je me fous du passe.



Avec mes souvenirs
J'ai allume des feux
Mes chagrins, mes plaisirs-
Je n'ai plus besoin d'eux

Balayes mes amours,
Avec leurs tremolos
Balayes pour toujours
Je repars a zero



Non, rien de rien
Non je ne regrette rien
Ni le bien qu'on ma fait
Ni le mal, tout ca m'est bien egal

Non, rien de rien
Non, Je ne regrette rien
Car ma vie, car mes joies, aujourd'hui-
Ca commence avec toi.

Gifts

Thought there should certainly be a directory for gifts & gift shops & suppliers.

Of course there are the usual favourites- like John Lewis', Jo Malone, the Conran Shop, L'Occitane (en Provence et en-ligne), Iwantoneof those - dot-com, Amazon, www.lovethelakes.net  and many more.

You can always give Spa vouchers like those from the RibbyHall SpaHotel.

Stuff comes up every now & then-

Recently there's been - www.ayedo.co.uk  who do a lovely bath set in a bucket at a good price & www.slumberslumber.com who sell a fab silk pillowcase which prevents hair crease & wrinkles.

Will update whenever there's new stuff.